On Oct 18, 2009, at 11:12 AM, penumbrook wrote:
Dear Editor:
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and October 14, letter writer, Mr. Michael Ra Bouchard, has done his part to create misunderstanding and fear about the nature of domestic violence. Couched in truths, Mr. Bouchard demands that abusers must be mandated to domestic violence treatment. Yet, anger is a family problem. You cannot treat one person as if they have a sickness. The family must learn to change. A man may hit, but it may be the woman who escalates. A woman may abuse all members of the family, and, most likely, she will claim to be the abused. Mr. Bouchard says domestic violence is good enough for ending a relationship. He does not tell you that there is an industry of people who will exploit a family rift to rip children from their fathers. 911 is not a parenting style. Advocating government intervention in families deeply hurts children, families and our whole society. Instead, teaching families how to redirect misguided behaviors can quell abuse, minimize sibling rivalry, and encourage a safe home environment. The Family Education Training Center of Hawaii (efetch.org) has helped hundreds of families over the past five years. Similar educational material can be found on activeparenting.com. Every family experiences conflict during their lifetimes. Resolving conflict for mutual benefit sometimes requires apologies and forgiveness and nearly always requires education. There is no excuse for tearing a family apart.
